What’s up folks? It’s Thursday again, and you know what that means, it’s Thyroid Thursday. Time to see who’s doing it BIG out there…….
Well first thing I can think of, SANTA CLAUS is doing it as big as you can right now. As the representation of the giving spirit of the Christmas holiday, everyone is talking bout the guy lately. Santa keeps it oh so real. He does about three million B&Es in one night. It’s funny he’s like Sean Connery or Clint Eastwood, I don’t just mean that old, I mean like one of those OG art thieves that trains all year for “the big job” to creep up in your spot. The job to end all jobs, the one that you can retire on. Not just to south beach all year round, with air conditioning and bocce ball. I’m talking about the score that has you trading arm candy while gambiling in Monaco, and sailing away the next day to your summer house, no the other summer house. But for some reason every year he’s back at it. Does he have a reckless gambling addiction? Maybe that combined with amazonian dominatrix prostitutes, or even both with a nasty Oxycotin and cocaine habit, and there you go. You have a old ass Chris Farley who you can’t seem to keep from being a weird “to catch a predator”, and come to your house when you’re asleep to leave little notes, and gifts to stay on your child’s mind for a month and a half out of the year. But why is he back, every year. Is that all that he has going for him? How even can he keep up every single year? Do they store him in one of those elder vampire coffins that only open for a couple days of the year? Do those elves work for him, or his really just an instrument of a secret elf agenda? For who’s ever mission that he is carrying out, he’s trained his whole life for this, and they’re is simply no one that could do it better. Forever doing what he was built to do, (were you thinking humanoid too? I know I was) I have to give it to the old fart. Getting up of the couch, and handling biz every F-ING YEAR, and proving it to every new generation. THAT’S doing it big.
